Man, usually don't fall for the infomercials ever since the set it and forget it rotisserie came out, but man this fucking sham wow thing is starting to get to me. I mean, this shit is absolutely frickin amazing. Maybe it's the guy just selling the shit out of it or maybe it's just me, but I can think of so many times in life where the sham wow would have been muthafuckin perrrrfect!
For starters I believe the guy selling the shit got the job because he was the top money taker at all of the traveling fairs in the United States. Dude probably started out at the game where you have to catapult the frogs on the lilly pads, got promoted to the ping pong ball in the fish bowl, then moved on to shoot the star out with the BB gun, and eventually landed the gig where you throw the darts at the balloon. And this all happened in just 7 short hours. Next thing you know he's got a Brittany Spears mike hooked to his head and he's on TV. Tell me you don't think the annoying fucker actually invented it?
Let's talk capability here. The sham wow can actually pull and entire can of soda out of the carpet without even applying any pressure. Do you realize what the potential there is? Lemme break it down rights quick. You have the fellas over watching some football and the ultimate party foul occurs. Brozilla has just spilled his beer on the carpet. Da du da duh da da nah na nah!!!! Ladies and gentleman I introduce the sham gotdamn wow. You suck that beer up out of the carpet lickity splizit and then wring it out into a cup. Homeboyee that fucked up and spilled his shit now has to drink his beer post carpet absorption. Next thing you know you gots dudes gripping their beers like it's forty-two one hundred dollar bills in their hand as they walk through Compton.
What am I thinking? You know this has to be some bull shit! I'm going to buy a weed auger now thank you very much!
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